Where Do I Go From Here.....

So, just like that, my ophthalmologist washed his hands of me and I was left to figure out Where do I go from here? A very good friend directed me to a neurologist and the next week was spent tying to deal with the pain and vision loss on top of numerous phone calls and waiting. Lots and lots of waiting.  My appointment with the neurologist could not come fast enough.

Each day my sweet husband did anything and everything he could for me.  He would wake up early daily to get both kids to school and take me to and from work when I needed to go. His mother even drove in from Louisiana to help us hold down the fort. She cooked, cleaned, took care of the kiddos, did laundry and anything else she could think of.  She even bought us a deep freeze.... HAPPY HAVING MS TO ME!  Ryan and I were so sad to see her leave....  My family in AZ called me multiple times a day offering to help in any way necessary. I found my self surrounded by so much love and support that it comforted me beyond belief.

By the time my appointment rolled around I was a serious emotional mess. If I wasn't working, I was half comatose. If I had a second of clarity I was researching MS and trying to gather my "list" of questions and concerns for the doctor. My emotions gave me and everyone around me serious whip lash. If I wasn't crying, I was angry as hell. If I wasn't angry or sad I was numb. My range of emotions is a whole other blog in itself......

As Ryan, Ryker and I entered the office of Dr. Philip Blum my stomach was in knots. I had a million questions running through my head, "Was he going to listen to me? Was he actually going to talk to me? Maybe he will tell me it was a fluke..." From the moment he walked in the room, I was immediately at ease. He was absolutely amazing. He talked extensively with me about what led me to see him, symptoms I had now and in the past and many other things. He also did a very thorough exam and explained each one to me. In the end he took the time to show me my MRI and answer EVERY SINGLE QUESTION I had written in my little blue notebook.  He encouraged me to do research on my disease and directed me to the best (and only) MS websites I should visit.  I left with a sense of peace, knowing that I had a forward plan and my health care was going to be in amazing hands.

So, where DO I go from here? Since my "flare-up" was so severe I am scheduled to do a course of IV steroids at an out patient clinic for three days. Dr Blum is confident that this will help me reclaim my life and get my vision back. It will take a few months for it to fully recover but Ill take that over what I have now any day. I'll go back to see Dr Blum in a few weeks and we discuss the option of medication. I'm still not sure how I feel about having to be on a daily medication for the rest of my life, but I have plenty of time to decide.

In the mean time, my dear chiro friend, Dr Stagenwald, dropped her whole life, packed up her three kids and drove to Houston from the Dallas area to work on me. She has been doing a technique on me called menigial decompression and helping me sort out my nutrition and diet. SERIOUSLY? How blessed am I?

I obviously have a lot to sort through and I am still overwhelmed and in pain BUT at least I have a plan and

I have decided:

I WILL LEARN TO DEAL WITH THIS DISEASE. I WILL NOT DIE FROM IT OR BECOME DISABLED FROM IT. 

I AM A WARRIOR.